Why Do Men Cheat? 8 Most Common Reasons


Infidelity in a relationship is not a trivial matter and should not be handled with levity because it can spoil the best relationship when it happens. Any partner can do it, and numerous factors cause a man or woman to cheat. People often ask, “why do men cheat?” and getting answers can be tricky.

In this guide, you'll learn why men cheat. Read on for some of the reasons why men cheat.

Part 1. Reasons Why Men Cheat

Cheating in relationships and marriages is fast becoming a norm in various societies. Before discovering the solution or how to stop a partner from cheating, if possible, one must understand the reason behind the action.

Hence, the need to discuss why men cheat in relationships and marriages. Below are some of the reasons:

Falling Out of Love

The incredible feeling of falling in love with your partner will only be around for a while. That means, when you fall in love with someone, there's a feeling of passion and the rush of dopamine that you feel from getting a simple text or call from them. As stated earlier, you can't feel it for long. This is what affects most men.

Lasting love indeed exists but those perturbations, intoxication, and butterflies you feel on your first date with your partner don't last forever. What happens is that that kind of love begins to fade, which causes the interest in their partners to dwindle. Once this happens, it can cause the man to cheat.

Once the love and romantic feeling for their partner are out of it, it brings about commitment issues which stimulate infidelity.

Getting Angry or Seeking Revenge

Imagine a man catches his partner in her with another man getting stroked intensely and moaning passionately. The man can cheat on his partner out of hurt, anger, or wanting to seek revenge.

People often see cheating as a way to get back at their partner. They will say, "They hurt me, so I'll hurt them too." However, cheating motivated by anger is not all about revenge. It might also be because of frustration when your partner doesn't understand what you want, arguments, wanting to be intimate with someone else due to anger, frustration due to the absence of a partner, etc.

All these are part of the reasons why men cheat. Infidelity is mostly caused by little things that partners ignore.

Circumstances and Getting Opportunities to Cheat

When a man gets the opportunity to cheat, he likely would. This doesn't mean everyone who gets the chance to cheat will. Other factors contribute to cheating apart from getting the opportunity to. Imagine a man attending a house party with his friends, and he got drunk.

Suppose he gets the opportunity to get down with another lady. In that case, he will most likely maximize it because of the situation, especially if he's going through some problems in his relationship. He will surely seek solace in getting down with her.

Imagine a man who has a distance problem in his relationship. He's in a long-distance relationship and has a misunderstanding with his partner. If a co-worker he likes walks up to him and confesses that she's attracted to him and wants them to make out, he will most likely accept the offer.

Summarily, circumstances and situations are also some of the reasons men cheat.

Having Commitment Issues

Some men naturally find it hard to commit to someone for a long time. People like this have a hard time with commitment. So, it's not a matter of what you do. It's more of their problem. Also, the definition of commitment is peculiar to everyone.

This means that commitment to you might not be what it means to your partner. For illustration, it's possible for two people to be in a relationship and have different tags for the relationship or different ideas about the relationship status.

Furthermore, it's possible to like someone and have a fear of committing yourself to them. When this happens, the man can cheat as an excuse to avoid commitment, even though they want to be in the relationship.

Lack of commitment is one of the reasons men cheat. It can happen due to wanting a casual relationship, wanting a way out of a relationship, or generally lacking interest in long-term relationships.

A Man Can Cheat When His Needs Aren’t Met

Sometimes, when a man's desire to be intimate with his partner or other needs in a relationship, like attention, respect, etc., aren't met, it might cause him to cheat. Some men might choose to leave the relationship totally or stay in the relationship and cheat.

When the desires of any of the partners aren't met in a relationship, it can lead to frustration which can make them cheat. The man might be motivated to seek solace and satisfy his desires elsewhere.

This is why it's important to communicate with your partner as a lady because it's important for his need to be met to avoid infidelity issues. If you're not interested in what he has to say, what he thinks, or wants, he might decide to share them with someone interested. When this happens, it leads to an emotional connection between them, and cheating happens.

Some of the causes of unmet needs are situations where partners have different sex drives, lack of interest in sex by the lady, unnecessary or unreasonable distance between the man and his partner, etc.

Desire to Explore

When it comes to wanting to explore relationships, it's mostly about sex. Men commonly want to explore sex positions, locations, etc. It's important to understand that even if a man and a woman are compatible, they might not have the same sexual interest and orientation. For instance, a man might be interested in exploring numerous sex positions that their partner isn't interested in. If it's not discussed and settled amicably, the man might decide to explore with someone else.

Some men are naturally attracted to numerous ladies, which can also make them intimate with any lady they are attracted to. It takes a high level of discipline for a man who gets attracted to ladies easily to stay committed.

Exploring can also mean desiring different conversations or styles of communication, being in a relationship with other people in addition to their current relationship, etc. The truth is attraction is a big part of the exploration. Most men explore mainly because they get attracted to numerous women, and being in a relationship doesn't hinder them.

Having Sexual Desire

A simple urge to have sex at a particular time can cheat a man if his partner isn't available. This is common in men with a high libido who can't control their sexual urges.

This can also happen to people in sexually fulfilling relationships. They might want to have more sex with more people. In this case, it's not about the inability of their partner to satisfy them or the absence of their partner. It's about their lack of control over their sexual desire.

Low Self-Esteem

It's possible for a man to cheat because he wants to boost his self-esteem. Some men feel a feeling of pride that comes with having sex with a new person. It tends to make them feel powerful, confident, and even successful. These are the ways they choose to build their self-esteem.

Many people who cheat because they want to build their self-esteem tend to have loving and supportive partners who encourage them and are compassionate. Regardless, they still feel like cheating is the best way to eliminate their low self-esteem and feel like a man.

They cheat consciously because it's one of the ways to make them feel better about themselves. Most times, they see cheating as an escape from their negative feelings about themselves instead of seeking therapy and taking care of themselves healthily.

Part 2. Do Men or Women Cheat More?

This is a frequently asked question because it has been a concern between both genders. According to research by the 2018 General social survey, it's said that men cheat more than women do. 20% of married men have slept with someone else apart from their wives, while 13% of married women have slept with someone else apart from their husbands.

However, recent research shows that the figures are getting closer, and this isn't because men have reduced the rate at which they cheat. It's simply because women now cheat more. Women cheating on their men, either with other men or younger guys, is now rampant in society.


If you ever notice that your man is cheating, the best thing to do is not sweat over it but talk it out with him. If he doesn't listen and doesn't want to seek a healthy solution by visiting a therapist, you can let him be or divorce him if you're uncomfortable with it.

Cheating is a personal decision, although external factors influence a person to cheat. Don’t take responsibility for what you have no control over.

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